First published in 1813, Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice aptly describes the nature of courtship and marriage in English of the 19th century. In this novel, Elizabeth Bennett eventually marries Fitzwilliam Darcy, a man who owns a considerable fortune. This is, supposedly, romantic love, and romantic love was only available to those who could afford it (MacFarlane 205). For the most part, “who you marry will be greatly circumscribed by the rank you are born into” (MacFarlane 252). According to Park Honan, “romantic love among the nobility was more preached than practiced… a desirable marriage was designed by the person's unshakable feelings” (Honan 193). Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on "Why Violent Video Games Shouldn't Be Banned"? Get an Original Essay Courtship came before marriage and was seen as determining compatibility. Potential partners met at church or at dances (where Elizabeth meets Mr. Darcy) and continued to meet for some time (Honan 312). An interesting piece of information is that some people considered sex acceptable after engagement (MacFarlane 306). In fact, “1/3 of women were pregnant when they got married” (MacFarlane 306). In 19th century England people placed much more importance on courtship than young couples today: "Once you propose, your job is to inform the woman's parents or guardians of your intentions, at the same time indicating the your circumstances and what arrangement you intend must impose on your future wife, and, for their part, they must state what her fortune will be as near as you can estimate..." (Pool 191). The marriage seemed more like a business arrangement than a matter of desire. For example, a husband often had to take a wealthy wife to further enhance the ancestral surname (Pool 181). There were also certain social norms regarding who one could marry. A man, for example, could not marry his deceased wife's sister, but two first cousins could marry. This occurred frequently, as evidenced by Mr. Collins' proposal in Pride and Prejudice (Pool 180). People mostly married within their rank, although this was not a formal rule. Because women depended on their parents to provide dowry, many chose to wait and let the money accumulate to create a better marriage. "If a girl wished to marry well, she would be advised to bide her time. Often her economic attractiveness increased just as her physical attractiveness waned" (MarFarlane 277). This typically occurred during a woman's mid-twenties. (MacFarlane 277). Men typically waited to marry until they could earn a living independently (MacFarlane 278). “The more he delayed his marriage, the greater his chances of experiencing a comfortable middle and old age” (MacFarlane 278). Before the wedding can take place, parental permission may be needed. “Until 1823, a man or woman under the age of 21 could not marry without parental permission” (Pool 180). Lydia Bennett and Wickham approach this problem in a turn-of-the-century manner. “In the early years of the century, people who wanted to evade the requirements crossed the border into Scotland to a little town called Gretna Green” (Pool 183). There were also legal matters to take care of before the wedding. Lawyers will calculate the dowry: the wealth required by the bride and her family for the wedding. "The going rate for onewoman of aristocratic rank who married a person of the same status in 1870 was between 10 and 30 thousand pounds" (Pool 301). In these marriage agreements the joint venture was also formed (a legal term designating a part of the husband's estate for the widow after his death) (Pool 327). This would include the portion that could be used for their children's dowry. "The bride's family had to worry about making sure that she and her children had something to live on if the husband died or had been a wastrel" (Pool 181). For this reason, the sum of money, an allowance given to a woman upon marriage, was "often explicitly negotiated as part of the marriage agreement between the families of a potential husband and wife" to spend on household items or personal ornaments ( Pool 353). Strangely, bridewealth, or bride price (the amount the husband and his family paid to the bride's family for the bride) does not it was seen more in England after the 15th century. It was relevant in other countries, and still is in some (MacFarlane 277-278). As you might imagine, having more than one daughter was a strain on family finances. “Bennett's misfortune was to have five daughters, and his dilemma is exaggerated in wartime when men are scarce and daughters burdensome…” (Honan 310). But in reality only the eldest son seemed to have the upper hand in 19th century life. “Only the eldest son, except in areas of partial inheritance, would receive the greater estate” (MacFarlane 280). Of course, they could use their money to help their younger brothers and sisters, but they were not obligated to do so. “It would appear that the younger sons and daughters were treated as equals” (MacFarlane 280). Once affairs are settled, the wedding may finally be announced. Banns were the cheapest and most public way to get permission to marry (Pool 264). This required the rector or parochial vicar to announce an impending marriage during the service on three consecutive Sunday mornings. “If no one rose up to ban publications during the reading, the spouses could marry in the following three months” (Pool 264). You could also get a marriage license if you didn't want to get married through banns. There were three different types: the Archbishop of Canterbury could provide a "special license" to marry anytime, anywhere; a local minister could grant a much cheaper license allowing parish marriage (Pool 332); or “one could also obtain a license to perform a simple civic ceremony at the local registry office or a ceremony at a Nonconformist place of worship” (Pool 332). Elizabeth Bennett's mother in Pride and Prejudice pushes her to get a special license to marry, as Darcy is rich enough to afford it. Four types of assets were needed to get married: a house, furnishings for both the home and the body, an assured income, and cash (MacFarlane 263). By law the actual wedding had to take place in the morning (typically at nine) until the late 1880s, but could last until three in the afternoon (Pool 183). This is why most 19th-century novels about weddings describe the traditional wedding breakfast. The bride and groom were not required to invite their immediate family, although it was generally social custom to do so (Pool 183). It was also customary to throw shoes at the bride and groom after the ceremony (Pool 183). In another interesting fact from the era during which Pride and Prejudice was written, the bride could ask a partner to accompany her on her honeymoon. With marriage the woman lost all control over her assets, done., 1993.
tags