In every relationship, both parties bring their past experiences to the table. No one, including your dog, is immune to the baggage and habits of years past. Every individual is shaped, profoundly and often unconsciously, by what they have learned in life. Moments become memories and memories become ideas. Some actions pay off and become useful strategies that, over time, become habitual responses. Life offers a million opportunities for some kind of take-home message for your dog. Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on "Why Violent Video Games Shouldn't Be Banned"? Get an Original EssayWhat will be the message of the moment for your dog? Is this the first monumental discovery that the appearance of the leash can mean a walk is coming? When you sit at the computer, does it indicate a great opportunity to eat cat poop from the litter box? Perhaps a mental note that young children are affectionate and have little regard for personal space? The possibility that biting your pant legs while walking around the house is the best way to get you to throw the ball for her? That furry, doe-eyed little creature at your feet is a lot smarter than you might give it credit for. Because learning arguably provides the greatest window of opportunity to change and adapt your dog's behavior, it's important that you understand how your dog learns on a practical, day-to-day level. In this chapter you will be introduced to this critically important element of your canine partner's behavior. You'll learn to recognize your role in shaping his adorable little rituals as well as those irritating cycles of bad behavior. This will prevent you from projecting false motivations onto her and feeling unnecessarily resentful of her sock stealing and child chasing. You'll see how events can take on strong meanings for your dog, no matter how casual his associations may seem (people wearing white coats don't necessarily have sharp objects in their pockets just because the vet has them; and the noise of the door of 'closet that opens doesn't (doesn't always mean she gets a prize). If I had a dollar for every time a wife sarcastically asked me if I could train her husband along with their dog, I would be a very rich woman someone who is driving us crazy to be “trained” and to have them back as a cooperative, pleasant replacement who no longer exhibits those annoying behaviors is really tempting. Many people enter therapy with their dog (or any partner, for that matter) with the goal of correcting or controlling unwanted behavior. The reality is that all relationships are a two-way street, even when it seems that one party has the upper hand or that one is inherently more dependent on the other. Between you and your dog are two individuals trying to negotiate life in harmony. No one is “bad” for not being able to align with the other's expectations. No one is at the service of the other. A common misconception is that a dog's learning is simply about "training." If only it were as simple as taking a six-week obedience course and emerging with the perfect pet. Here's a big pill to swallow before we begin our conversation about learning: “Dog training” is a misnomer. Your canine friend is no more “trainable” than your spouse. What dogs and spouses are can be taught by life, and you are obviously an important part of life experiences in both cases. Under the right circumstances and with the right set of tools, learning can be.